Connie Chung New York, New York

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Track Name: Go In (prod. Connie Chung)
(we're going in)

"abandon ship, you'll get your keep"
that's what they said
and in my foolishness
i listened and let them into my bed
young messiah, where've you been?
i've been closely listening
but all i hear is dead air coming from deep in your head

that's right, no love for deep web
folk memes, code red
found sound, get crowned
implied, he said
bad kids, bad head,
bent down, eat lead
all brown, don't frown
misled, misread.

now i'm going in
wearing an armor made of skin
you wipe it off,
take a glance, declare: urine
never been the type to dwell
on this organic, fresh hell
automatic cypher
topical and real as well

you might call it a mission
but i'm not trying to convert
you might say that it's dangerous
but i'm immune to hurt
you might think that it's controversial
but i disconcert
for a living and a killing
go ahead and eat dirt
Track Name: The Reaping (prod. Arca)
illusions of scarcity, pursuit of perfection
desensitize yourself to the pain of rejection
you never have enough cuz you still want more
who's keeping score in the general election?
sinewy and silent, never violent, with your own perception
20/20's overrated, yields unnecessary questions

my brain is fried in a million tiny pieces
breaking up quietly as my edges sizzle
crisp and brown.
forget the pants, who wears the crown in this relationship?
i wonder if i can't reserve that title for myself.
and i don't need any help because i've bought into a world
where we are all
self-sufficient and alone.
and i need to reap what i've sown.

(give some time to the middle ones
i know that feeling of suspension
hungry for attention
always getting away)
Track Name: Who They Is (prod. Arca)
reppin' API though i don't have the cred
got a lineage before me running deep inside my head
what i said was just regurgitated shit like "fuck the feds"
seeking all the adulation before slinking off to bed

go ahead, say the words, they're on the tip of your tongue:
"he's so naïve, idealistic, immature, and young"
i was born six weeks, never had good lungs
always gasping for breath, tryna be heard

now you've wrung me dry
i wish that you could understand how it feels
to be silenced by a platform of respectability
to be reeled in by facelessness,
come in and peel this mask off
and maybe you'll find someone real

never healed because i didn't want to play the victim
but in this world if you're not against them you're with them
my complicity a mark on my forehead from years of practice
a red flag to my comrades in this fight for justice

used to think i had to find myself
used to think i had to know myself

(but that truly some nonsense so they put the blame on me)

so let me rise to the bait of your hate
you know i don't need to tell you cuz you know that you're fake
i tried to care about your feelings and your little heart breaking
does it get good? boy, i'm still here waiting

it takes a lot it hurts a lot it gives a lot, i'm shaken
all these motherfuckers walk around like they taking
from the vestiges of beauty that my family's forsaken
in the name of your freedom, in the name of a nation

my story's being written as i speak, in the nascent stages,
and i've hardly had a peek at the adjacent pages
but i know what i'll find when i glance behind:
contradicting narratives intertwined

used to think i had to find myself
used to think i had to know myself

Track Name: Hallucinogen feat. Annie Loren (prod. Arca)
get a bit lethargic and
my heart is laced with arsenic
an arsonist i've seen in my dreams
it's a piece of me dissolved in acid
time to secure my assets
and i hate this part a lot
gotta call my accountant

show up dazed and confused
searching all over for my muse
slanting hard and my excuse is that
it's all merely a ruse
take a pleasure cruise,
the worst thing that you'll ever do
you know it's true
imagine all the people waitin in the crew

sand it down, don't clown with brown town
make found sound
pound the alarm like your life depends on it
wrote a message and i'm sending it
got this earth i'm bending it
pretending that it doesn't make me sick
what makes you click?
5 in the morning and i think about your dick
and i'll stab my eyes out with an ice pick

wonder if you'd miss your life if it passed you by
picked it up off the floor and tried it on for size
and it didn't really fit
wasn't really my style
took it off and flung it into the discarded pile
Track Name: Crazes (prod. 澤野弘之)
i dream that maybe we'll burn together
how does that sound? if we stay and weather
the storm we might survive, but the aftermath crazes
the surface of this earth with a million mazes
the faces staring up, blank as the world erupts
nothingness accusing me of negligence run amok
and i know deep inside that if i tried a little harder
they would maybe be alive, i would maybe be a martyr
it's a voice of God resonating in my ears
calling me a failure as i wipe away my own tears
and i wake up as the final death toll appears
i haven't had this nightmare in nearly ten years

do you remember what you were doing when you were eleven years old?
cuz i've been trying to retrace my steps
do you remember what you were doing when you were eleven years old?
cuz i haven't found anything yet

and now there's silence in response to violence
sitting on a pedestal massaging my conscience
talking in circles, calling for divestment
never taking the chance to make a risky investment
but i'm tired of being afraid to be culpable
tired of trying to make contradictions resolvable
give me rough edges, watch me embrace them
not a cause of death but a response to your reason

do you remember what you were doing when you were eleven years old?
cuz i've been trying to replace my past
do you remember what you were doing when you were eleven years old?
cuz i'm putting memories to rest
Track Name: 123 (prod. Gangpol und Mit)
stave it off 1 2 3
and there's so many things you wish you could be
let's see: a savior, commander, a good person
i see you tryna think of it as better or worse than
mm, sorry, that's not how it works
a zero sum game of personality quirks
i'd call you immoral
but i don't really think that would make a dent in your personality

you keep me breathing you heathen why come you gotta be so bad
you know that if i gave two shits about you it would make me sad
but as for now it's energizing cuz i'm sizing you up
and fuck this feeling i'm reeling from boy you know you're in luck

and i know that i'm compromising
expending too much energy maximalizing
i'm done with you because you ain't recognizing
my usual abstractions materializing
got my legs propped up, i'm realizing that
you're a cancer metastasizing
and the only way to live is to cut you out
which i really don't mind cuz you're such a lout

let's get together and listen to björk
i really like to tell myself that i'm a piece of work
with a predisposition to completely shirk
my responsibilities with a laugh and a smirk
i'm self-destructive with a penchant for the melodramatic
and what i let you see is just an animatic
when everything's filled in you better run and hide
because what goes on underneath runs deep and far and wide

(go to sleep and don't wake up
strap on your heels, and let's make up)

wait, where the fuck even am i?
thought this was a screening of seven samurai
now i'm discombobulated and feeling semi-conscious and woozy and drunk
you're kind of a hunk and i'm bored already
hold steady, that's a band you probably listen to
am i right? i'm usually right. i've never heard them but i think i'm right.

and i'm not playin no i got a piece and i'm ready to say it now
i really think that i got to show you how to not be your usual self
but i really wanna turn down a little bit
gotta be able to see you clearly come to me
and i'll take care of you

attention: subjects with tension have ascension on their schedules today
attention: subjects with pensions have ascension on their minds
attention: all men and yes i mean all men are to be stopped
attention: all men and yes i mean all men you have been dropped
Track Name: I Remember You (prod. Connie Chung)
i think i love it
need you to glove it up
i think i want it
need you to shove it up

do you remember, muhfucka was the worst in town
and then of course there i was on the DL tryna clown
hit me up like where you at are you lookin are you down
come inside and treat me right turn me out on the ground

don't hang around, cuz you know that you're my lost and found
if i'm still dreamin then you better not make a sound
find your keys and drive home to your breeding ground
while i lie in bed and get my beauty rest

boy i'm crowned queen

white men bore me, restore me with your tears
and i'll paint my fingernails as you confess to me your fears
man i eat that shit up, pretending that i care
words rolling off my tongue with my fistful of your hair

and i think to myself, what a wonderful world
an illusion, a utopia, a blueprint unfurled
drinking ambrosia cuz you know that zeus got nothing on me
i got my one titty out and i'm quality

boy i'm crowned queen
Track Name: Veneer (prod. Mouse on Mars)
i wish i felt actualized in the morning
i'm corny
and deathly afraid that i'm boring
restoring factory settings
my friends are all having weddings
and i watch from afar in 600 thread bedding

let's talk together cuz i'm curious
in other news i'm furious about these thinkpieces on millennials
when i think back i remember bicentennial man
and not much else to be honest

so i don't mind being alive
but i'm over just surviving
it's not so much passé as undermining
no i don't mind being alive
but i'm over just surviving
it's not so much passé as undefining

i guess i'm a closeted pretentious (that's a noun now)
and i'm really rather tired of trying to kowtow to this industry
(he said in a white boy voice)
the potentiality of sexuality as choice
is a little overwhelming if we're being real
how does it feel to be opened up from the inside?
i've got nothing to hide anymore
so why the fuck do i care what strangers think?

liberation is a funny little word, don't you think?
think i need a conscience, no what i need's a drink
you got me chuffed to bits absolutely tickled pink
say it in a cockney accent: "is that what you fink"
"hallelujah," he says, "it's the final form"
reproduction as demeaning, authenticity as porn
when i meet you at half past three in the morning
it's in the single digits and we're trying to stay warm

"these pretzels are making me thirsty"
you know i'm kirstie alley
now i'm sounding like i'm at my parents' age
proselytizing and serving wisdom with sage
who knows? it might be a look i wear well
how goes it, old chap, oh please pray tell..
nah, feels unconvincing.
i've never been able to sell a performance i didn't believe in

and now your favorite anime's on instant watch
but it's dubbed and as usual that totally botches the meaning of the script
amps it up too many notches
and renders it the stuff of vod in motor lodges
how about those dodgers?
never heard anybody say that because i never really grew up around a culture of sports
of which there are two kinds: there's good old-fashioned team spirit
and then there's cricket with white boys in salmon shorts

so i don't mind being alive
but i'm over just surviving
it's not so much passé as undermining
no i don't mind being alive
but i'm over just surviving
it's not so much passé as undefining

(all these cities are starting to blur together)

let's go ahead and talk about it, talk it out, feel it out
so we get in touch with ourselves
and the foundations of consciousness, okay?
oh my god i haven't seen you in a while oh hey
let's talk about speech pathology and uptalking
all the things you say that sound less smart than stephen hawking
but man, fuck your respectability, god
your face is smug as hell
your tone openly mocking

but the joke is on you

(all these cities are starting to blur together)
Track Name: BBB (prod. Gangpol und Mit)
i don't trust myself anymore
and you wish you knew the reason why
what's your supply? i think you're running low
moving too slowly
i'm so unholy
you're looking homely
standing in the back singing "oh comely"

you call yourself "disaffected"
blasé erected
"make sure that you're protected and uninfected"
"i don't care how it feels!"
watch me as i kick my heels up yours
directed by harmony korine
authentic original sin
playing the tiniest violin
digging deep into your skin
a piece of shit-eating grin
sitting back with your gin
"i love paris, have you been?"

stop being such a bossy business bottom boy
it's not a good look for you
and i swear that i've got cotton mouth
from excessively eating you
if i may say so myself i do not think the meal was worth it
and it will take at least a year for us to unearth it
was that a bit too much for your delicate sensibilities
for my taste at least you foreclose too many possibilities
see i prefer my masc bros thrown in he trash
with a tail between their legs and out the door in a flash
Track Name: Until Next Time (prod. Sayonara Ponytail)
geriatric mary magdalene
keep it running cuz i got original sin
go to confession dressed in fashion
got you on your knees, uh

you want this doodoo
i think it suits you
and i refuse to
stop doing me

but boy you sweatin and getting me drinkin templeton rye
and i would call your ass pretentious if it wasn't so fine
cuz you tie my tongue up, you've got me all strung up
and i don't know what to say

all my words are coming out in a jumbled fashion
and i never thought i'd care
but i want to see if something is there

so thanks for listening
ain't no christening that could touch this high
i've been blue dreaming so you know i'm floating in the sky

and i hope that you can join me
and i hope that you'll enjoy me
and i hope i'm not annoying

i'm catching blessings
learning lessons
teach me how and why
i'll be so saddened when we finally have to say goodbye

and there's so much left to say but until next time